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Post by Tuffers on Mar 13, 2024 14:22:32 GMT
I just watched an 'oss race. I had money on the winner, but at very short odds. My current loss is about £3. TuffersI am not oppoesed to the ethical treatment of jockeys. I just don see how they could have any sort of life outside racing. Chimney Sweeps? Unless that's something else the Wokerati have cancelled. |
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Post by MrTiddles on Mar 13, 2024 14:24:35 GMT
Did you know?
Christina Aguilera's biggest fear is that she'll wake up in the morning and find a jockey in her hair.
No, no you did not.
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Post by BabyfarkmcGeezak on Mar 13, 2024 15:34:43 GMT
A guy dies and goes to hell
As he is wallowing in despair, he has his first meeting with the devil.
Satan: Why so glum? Guy: What do you think? I'm in hell!
Satan: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. Are you a drinking man? Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Satan: Well you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers etc. We drink till we throw up and then we drink some more! And we don't worry about getting a hangover because you're dead anyway. Guy: Gee, that sounds great!
Satan: You a smoker? Guy: You better believe it! Satan: All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer no biggie, you're already dead, remember? Guy: Wow... that's awesome!
Satan: I bet you like to gamble. Guy: Why yes, as a matter of fact I do. Satan: Great. On Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots. If you go bankrupt... you're dead anyhow.
Satan: Do you like drugs?? Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean... Satan: That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of coke or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want, you're dead, who cares. Guy: WOW! I never realized Hell was such a cool place!
Satan: Are you gay? Guy: No.
Satan: Oh, You're gonna hate Fridays.
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Post by MrTiddles on Mar 13, 2024 16:01:29 GMT
I've been doing a good thing for an old lady I know. She's addicted to Roast Chicken crisps, so a week ago I gave her 2 packets. (50p tip for me). Today, a 6 pack (another 50p tip). Next she would like 2x6 packs. Is this illegal? I mean, I'm outperforming a Vanguard ISA, but...
[EDIT] She only has one lung, so can't make it as far as Poundland.
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Post by MrTiddles on Mar 13, 2024 16:07:09 GMT
Also, duffed up a spoder last night. It was massive, made a right mess of the wall.
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Post by Faceless on Mar 13, 2024 16:10:48 GMT
What happens on Fridays?
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Post by Felice Landry on Mar 13, 2024 16:15:02 GMT
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Post by lazybones on Mar 13, 2024 16:21:08 GMT
I didn’t really like Fight Club. I think it was down to the Meatloaf character. Mainly down to the Meatloaf character.
I was in two minds about Arsenal last night. A part of me wishes them well but there was an extremely complacent and assured Arsenal fan on the tube the other day, talking up Arsenal and talking down Liverpool. I did not care for his manner.
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Post by Tuffers on Mar 13, 2024 16:55:14 GMT
There's no Fri-yay for Guy. |
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Post by crankcaller on Mar 13, 2024 18:15:26 GMT
McDonald's 50th anniversary.
"The long list of changes include “meltier” cheese, fresh lettuce with a “clean taste” and a new brioche style bun."
Oof. You'll all be ragin'
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Post by Faceless on Mar 13, 2024 18:36:12 GMT
McDonalds making sure it's on the right side of history
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Post by MrTiddles on Mar 13, 2024 18:49:41 GMT
McDonald's 50th anniversary. "The long list of changes include “meltier” cheese, fresh lettuce with a “clean taste” and a new brioche style bun." Oof. You'll all be ragin' McShenguins will be furious.
I did tell you...
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Post by MrTiddles on Mar 13, 2024 18:53:26 GMT
What are they doing about the onions, Crank. 'Cos I know.
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Post by RollingEscargot on Mar 13, 2024 18:58:58 GMT
I believe they will henceforth be 'assing' the onions.
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Post by Destry on Mar 13, 2024 19:06:49 GMT
Hello
Tomorrow I will be heading up north for my brother's funeral, returning on Friday.
Consequently I will be unable to post Friday's box tomorrow night. I'm sure one of you good (?) folk will be able to oblige.
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Post by crankcaller on Mar 13, 2024 19:12:59 GMT
Hope it goes as well as can be expected Destry. Best wishes to you and yours.
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Post by Ozymandias Kane on Mar 13, 2024 19:15:48 GMT
Our thoughts and prayers go with you Destry
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Post by RollingEscargot on Mar 13, 2024 20:06:55 GMT
All the best, Destry.
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Post by Tuffers on Mar 13, 2024 20:16:42 GMT
Best wishes for tomorrow, Destry.
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Post by Tuffers on Mar 13, 2024 20:22:59 GMT
I vote Shenguin for temporary leader.
Or Moderator1, if that is even their real name.
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Post by Tuffers on Mar 13, 2024 20:24:17 GMT
Basically anyone except Kane, BabyF or Tuffers. Or Scubar.
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Post by Faceless on Mar 13, 2024 20:29:52 GMT
All the best for tomorrow Destry. I hope it goes as well as it can
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Post by Ozymandias Kane on Mar 13, 2024 21:00:31 GMT
Basically anyone except Kane, BabyF or Tuffers. Or Scubar. That's fine by me, I'll be lurking nearby.  |
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Post by lazybones on Mar 13, 2024 22:35:00 GMT
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Post by lazybones on Mar 13, 2024 22:43:35 GMT
I have just been to see Dune part 2 at the pictures. I quite liked it, though at times it felt a bit like a 1980s Turkish Delight advert.
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