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Post by Tuffers on Jul 1, 2024 11:20:08 GMT
Anyone got any good puns?
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Post by Felice Landry on Jul 1, 2024 11:20:47 GMT
Does anyone know any jokes about big animals in Africa? What is the difference between a bison and a buffalo? You can't wash your hands in a buffalo. Also you don't get Bison in Africa. |
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Post by MrTiddles on Jul 1, 2024 12:03:31 GMT
Recommisioned the cat this morning, new battery, tyres inflated and gave it a good clean. Went out for a brief spin in it, all good. Not so good is the fact that the tyre dust caps had been pinched. A new low.
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Post by Faceless on Jul 1, 2024 12:17:21 GMT
I don't know if that's a deliberate typo or not
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Post by Felice Landry on Jul 1, 2024 12:19:37 GMT
I don't know if that's a deliberate typo or not I was thinking it might be good cat news but the ending confused me. |
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Post by MrTiddles on Jul 1, 2024 12:26:32 GMT
Typo.
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Post by MrTiddles on Jul 1, 2024 12:27:42 GMT
After I did the car, I was sweating harder than Tuffers in a butchers. |
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Post by Tuffers on Jul 1, 2024 12:32:24 GMT
I'm big boned!
(sob)
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Post by Tuffers on Jul 1, 2024 12:32:58 GMT
Lunchblog - tinned mackerel in tomato sauce on toast.
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Post by Tuffers on Jul 1, 2024 12:33:53 GMT
Also got a pack of choco Leibniz (orange) for this afters. Not all of the pack.
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Post by RollingEscargot on Jul 1, 2024 13:14:45 GMT
Two exotic fish in a tank. One says to the other, do you know how to drive this thing?
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Post by crankcaller on Jul 1, 2024 13:14:55 GMT
Orange choco Leibniz!
Never knew such a treat existed
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Post by MrTiddles on Jul 1, 2024 13:20:23 GMT
Just had some goons from the Trade Union & Socialist Coalition bang on my door. I engaged them in chat, all the chat.
They left.
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Post by Felice Landry on Jul 1, 2024 13:22:22 GMT
Just had some goons from the Trade Union & Socialist Coalition bang on my door. I engaged them in chat, all the chat. They left. Through the window? |
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Post by stxdpr on Jul 1, 2024 13:26:23 GMT
Anyone else joining the reds this Thursday? Rishi should have put the vote the day after England won the football to ensure biggest defeat.
I wouldn't suggest pumping the cat up with compressed air, may look like a novelty balloon but not do the cat much good.
Today is my Sunday suckers, although will be working sat and sun this week.
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Post by MrTiddles on Jul 1, 2024 13:31:26 GMT
Just had some goons from the Trade Union & Socialist Coalition bang on my door. I engaged them in chat, all the chat. They left. Through the window? I couldn't possibly comment on that, but they did try to sell me a copy of The Socialist for a pound. I told them I didn't have any cash, 'Oh, we've got a card reader'.
I may have said something impolite, and then they left.
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Post by Felice Landry on Jul 1, 2024 13:32:36 GMT
Lunchblog - tinned mackerel in tomato sauce on toast. We have the spicy version with pasta, cheap and easy* *cue jokes |
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Post by stxdpr on Jul 1, 2024 13:38:52 GMT
I couldn't possibly comment on that, but they did try to sell me a copy of The Socialist for a pound. I told them I didn't have any cash, 'Oh, we've got a card reader'.
I may have said something impolite, and then they left.
'All money and possessions are bowing to capitalism, come inside and share everything with me?' Not sure I'd run or try and burn you/me/everything down. |
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Post by Shenguin on Jul 1, 2024 13:45:45 GMT
Orange choco Leibniz! Never knew such a treat existed I ate two pieces of Orange Toblerone last night. It was faintly disappointing. It needed either the nougat or the orange, not both. I also have Switzerland in a sweepstake, so Saturday's match will be lose-lose for me. scubar, that's your cue for a Zurich comment. |
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Post by Shenguin on Jul 1, 2024 13:48:06 GMT
Two parrots on a perch. One says to the other, "Can you smell fish?"
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Post by MrTiddles on Jul 1, 2024 13:51:04 GMT
Two parrots on a perch. One says to the other, "Can you smell fish?" Boo...
(quite clever, though)
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Post by Tuffers on Jul 1, 2024 13:53:48 GMT
Two parrots on a perch. One says to the other, "Can you smell fish?" Boo...
(quite clever, though)
And older than Destry (no offence) |
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Post by MrTiddles on Jul 1, 2024 13:54:09 GMT
The local convenience store sells Mars Bars for 95p. What's that all about? They're having a fackin' Giraffe.* * Tuffers, take note. |
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Post by Tuffers on Jul 1, 2024 13:59:03 GMT
The local convenience store sells Mars Bars for 95p. What's that all about? They're having a fackin' Giraffe.* * Tuffers, take note. (clears throat and does cockney swagger) "oy, shat your norf n saarf*" *maarf** **mouth |
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Post by Faceless on Jul 1, 2024 14:00:25 GMT
I've been listening to Guns n Roses Chinese Democracy again*. I like it
*and so have my neighbours
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