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Post by RollingEscargot on Jan 24, 2020 12:30:49 GMT
I just heard on the radio that the snake thing is not true - it was bats. Someone fucked a bat in Wuhan marketplace.
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Post by MrTiddles on Jan 24, 2020 12:38:15 GMT
I've had swine flu, I still went to work. I hated my boss, bugger didn't catch it. I won't use his real name, let's call him Mark Forsyth.
Cunt of all cunts.
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Post by Conchord on Jan 24, 2020 12:39:16 GMT
Wasn't the ebola crisis triggered by bats too? You think people would learn.
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Post by cobblers on Jan 24, 2020 12:57:30 GMT
Leave the bats out of this.
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Post by Chumbles on Jan 24, 2020 13:00:56 GMT
I just heard on the radio that the snake thing is not true - it was bats. Someone fucked a bat in Wuhan marketplace. That's athletic, unless it's a variation on the elephant and cat joke. |
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Post by Tuffers on Jan 24, 2020 13:01:02 GMT
Classic Batfink.
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Post by gongfarmer on Jan 24, 2020 13:12:06 GMT
Rimchat… wait that doesn't look right
Colony #2 is struggling. Luckily my survivors have discovered how to dig graves and so there are fewer rotting corpses about the place. This seems to have lifted everyone's spirits from suicidal, to merely miserable. I only have 1 survivor of the original 3, and a random who wandered in. I've tried to lure in a couple of wounded raiders, but they have all decided they'd rather die than join my gang. Possibly the rotting bodies in the hospital helped speed them on. One prisoner escaped, and died during my attempts to 'persuade' them to come back. Another grave...
OTTM
'Ploughmans lunch' sandwich for lunch. Tasty, but missing a flagon of scrumpy.
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Post by Conchord on Jan 24, 2020 13:15:02 GMT
Leave the bats out of this. That was my point, if they had none of this would be happening. Who the fuck wants to eat/ fuck a bat anyway?! |
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Post by Chumbles on Jan 24, 2020 13:17:54 GMT
A bloke walks in to the Three Johns (an Islington pub, obvs.)... There's a nasty looking cat prowling around ... The landlord says "Don't mind it; it leaves the punters alone but any animals it will fight if they move and try and mate with if they don't."
"I saw the NO PETS signs on the way in." He orders 2 pints.
The landlord said "You can always drink one first and order the second later."
"These are for my pet Elephant - she's in the garden..."
"I bet you those 2 pints that my cat could fuck your elephant; if we took a stool out there."
"More likely the other way round
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Post by sandybahookie on Jan 24, 2020 13:22:06 GMT
I saw a photo of a woman eating a bat with chopsticks and a dead one floating in soup, you could see its wee sharp teeth. Lets face it the Chinese pretty much deserve some retribution from the animal kingdom. How many tiger bollocks and rhino tusks and bats, chicken beak soup and puppy cake do they have to eat before they start getting some bad viruses. its the rest of us I feel sorry for.
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Post by sandybahookie on Jan 24, 2020 13:24:09 GMT
A bloke walks in to the Three Johns (an Islington pub, obvs.)... There's a nasty looking cat prowling around ... The landlord says "Don't mind it; it leaves the punters alone but any animals it will fight if they move and try and mate with if they don't." "I saw the NO PETS signs on the way in." He orders 2 pints. The landlord said "You can always drink one first and order the second later." "These are for my pet Elephant - she's in the garden..." "I bet you those 2 pints that my cat could fuck your elephant; if we took a stool out there." "More likely the other way round I dont get it... |
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Post by Faceless on Jan 24, 2020 13:25:03 GMT
Did anyone see the video on tinternet not so long ago of the skinned frog trying to escape the plate? Think that was in China. I'd try to find a link, but I don't want to see it ever again. Pure nightmare fuel.
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Post by Chumbles on Jan 24, 2020 13:25:39 GMT
So they take the cat and stool into the garden where the jumbo is waiting for her pints... the Landlord places the stool at the rear end of the beast while it drinks the two pints...
... and the elephant sighs and plants its arse squarely down crushing the cat ...
"That's fucked that, ain't it!"
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Post by RollingEscargot on Jan 24, 2020 13:29:27 GMT
Let's not get too sympathetic for the bats until we are certain that it wasn't a bat who initiated the original encounter.
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Post by Faceless on Jan 24, 2020 13:32:13 GMT
Let's not get too sympathetic for the bats until we are certain that it wasn't a bat who initiated the original encounter. Are you suggesting that the bat was asking for it, going out dressed like that? |
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Post by Chumbles on Jan 24, 2020 13:44:02 GMT
Let's not get too sympathetic for the bats until we are certain that it wasn't a bat who initiated the original encounter. Are you suggesting that the bat was asking for it, going out dressed like that? Just hanging about, actually ... |
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Post by Conchord on Jan 24, 2020 13:46:56 GMT
Calm down Harvey.
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Post by dakylosaurus419 on Jan 24, 2020 13:48:44 GMT
Video games - I was all excited about playing the new League Of Legends Hearthstone but it seems it only runs on the Excel PCs at work, so I can't. Top banana.
OGTM - Kentucky Route 0 is going out on switch next week, you'd better all buy it because its treeeee mendous.
OTTM - Eating certain animals being acceptable is just cultural norms, we eat all sorts of weird junk from the sea and stuff, sausages, Bernard Matthews turkeys. I mean I don't but you lot probably do.
OBTM - That said, whoever ignored the Who's advice about "unprotected" contact with wild animals is a proper wrong un.
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Post by tenthenemy on Jan 24, 2020 14:00:04 GMT
Let's not get too sympathetic for the bats until we are certain that it wasn't a bat who initiated the original encounter. Are you suggesting that the bat was asking for it, going out dressed like that? Was it this one?  (Eeep. In my effort to find this picture I caught a glimpse of the deviantart. Nopenopenopenopenope.) |
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Post by crankcaller on Jan 24, 2020 14:04:41 GMT
Tenthen in JRPG Guardian pick shocker.
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Post by Faceless on Jan 24, 2020 14:13:07 GMT
At the risk of triggering a bout of mania by agreeing with dakyl, Kentucky Route Zero is well good.
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Post by Lurk McLurkface on Jan 24, 2020 14:24:00 GMT
Did anyone see the video on tinternet not so long ago of the skinned frog trying to escape the plate? Think that was in China. I'd try to find a link, but I don't want to see it ever again. Pure nightmare fuel. In that case you deffo do NOT want to do a video search for '3 squeaks'. |
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Post by Faceless on Jan 24, 2020 14:38:28 GMT
Did anyone see the video on tinternet not so long ago of the skinned frog trying to escape the plate? Think that was in China. I'd try to find a link, but I don't want to see it ever again. Pure nightmare fuel. In that case you deffo do NOT want to do a video search for '3 squeaks'. Pretty sure I've already seen that. |
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Post by Faceless on Jan 24, 2020 14:39:56 GMT
Fuck sake lurkio. Yeah I've seen that before. I also used to work with a guy who'd seen it first hand.
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Post by tenthenemy on Jan 24, 2020 14:48:31 GMT
Did anyone see the video on tinternet not so long ago of the skinned frog trying to escape the plate? Think that was in China. I'd try to find a link, but I don't want to see it ever again. Pure nightmare fuel. In that case you deffo do NOT want to do a video search for '3 squeaks'. I had forgotten about this. Thanks for that. |
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