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Post by Admin on Oct 9, 2018 21:32:16 GMT
 It's Wednesday. |
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Post by BabyfarkmcGeezak on Oct 9, 2018 21:51:35 GMT
It's not even 11pm on Tuesday yet.
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Post by lonewolf on Oct 10, 2018 6:47:05 GMT
Government appoint first ever minister for suicide.
No they havnt, they already have a brexit minister.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Oct 10, 2018 7:04:35 GMT
Ahh, here we are.
I need to apologise for my terrible abusive post yesterday.
I really didn’t mean to make light of economics and fail to include the true price of butter in my calculations, the initial price of the bread maker (£149, Lakeland), and my own labour costs.
I feel I should retire to the bleachers, head in my hands (I’ve owned my hands all my life, so they should be cost free by now)
Did I tell you I started Ass Creed Origins? As a camel simulator it’s amazing.
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Post by scubar on Oct 10, 2018 7:11:40 GMT
Ahh, here we are. I need to apologise for my terrible abusive post yesterday. I really didn’t mean to make light of economics and fail to include the true price of butter in my calculations, the initial price of the bread maker (£149, Lakeland), and my own labour costs. I feel I should retire to the bleachers, head in my hands (I’ve owned my hands all my life, so they should be cost free by now) Did I tell you I started Ass Creed Origins? As a camel simulator it’s amazing. but do the camels testicles expand and shrink with the temperature? That’s where the real horse/camel simulation bucks are |
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Post by BabyfarkmcGeezak on Oct 10, 2018 7:31:35 GMT
When I was waiting for a bus this morning the local sandwich owner Guido stepped in dog shit on the path and spent a few minutes dragging his shoes along the path and scraping the underside against a step. A portent for the day about to unfold perhaps.
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Post by MrTiddles on Oct 10, 2018 7:32:21 GMT
I watched cowboys vs aliens last night. I don't think it was historically accurate, though.
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Post by crankcaller on Oct 10, 2018 7:33:19 GMT
Good morning fellow, if I may, chumps.
What's the sketch with the wee plastic flippy up bits on McDonald's coffee cups. Pop them up and have them annoy you or rip them off and take half the lid with it. Ammmarite? Also why don't they cook bacon properly i.e. so the fat is rendered.
Games. Snoozing Dugs. Got loads of money and not really spent any. Bought a car but not much else. Going to buy some new clothes as my leather suit is probably a bit whiffy. I'm frightened swapping it will result in a battering but we shall see. Opened up the roll over their back and take them from behind move. You heard.
This afternoon we have a "staff conference" - can't wait.
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Post by crankcaller on Oct 10, 2018 7:36:53 GMT
I watched cowboys vs aliens last night. I don't think it was historically accurate, though. The balls on the cowboys horses didn't shrink when the aliens appeared? |
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Post by crankcaller on Oct 10, 2018 7:42:06 GMT
What Gordon Brown is saying about UC is probably all true and correct - unfortunately no-one will listen as it's Gordon Brown. It's like Homers speech in 'Simpson & Delialah' - execpt Gordo probably didn't need if phon-et-ic-ally.
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Post by MrTiddles on Oct 10, 2018 7:42:42 GMT
I watched cowboys vs aliens last night. I don't think it was historically accurate, though. The balls on the cowboys horses didn't shrink when the aliens appeared? I hadn't thought of that, and boy, did I spent a lot of time checking out the horse bobbles. Hypnotising. |
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Post by crankcaller on Oct 10, 2018 7:43:06 GMT
Hooting into the abyss.
Calm down dear.
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Post by MrTiddles on Oct 10, 2018 7:43:48 GMT
What Gordon Brown is saying about UC is probably all true and correct - unfortunately no-one will listen as it's Gordon Brown. It's like Homers speech in 'Simpson & Delialah' - execpt Gordo probably didn't need if phon-et-ic-ally. UC - Universal credit? |
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Post by BabyfarkmcGeezak on Oct 10, 2018 7:59:35 GMT
What Gordon Brown is saying about UC is probably all true and correct - unfortunately no-one will listen as it's Gordon Brown. It's like Homers speech in 'Simpson & Delialah' - execpt Gordo probably didn't need if phon-et-ic-ally. UC - Universal credit? Aye, the wonderful Tory plan which, even leaving aside the fact it is far too complicated to work smoothly or get people to utilise when most needed, effectively takes thousands of pounds of lone parents and the disabled every year. |
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Post by MrTiddles on Oct 10, 2018 8:08:37 GMT
I'll just post this quick story. It's more a visual anecdote, so will not translate so well, but here goes:-
2 days ago, I was outside the flat having a ciggy, when I noticed 2 well dressed ladies looking lost. They came over to me and were looking for 'The Jehovans' upstairs. I pointed out that I didn't think they were in, nonetheless, they turned around and started walking back to the stairwell. At this point, dear reader, my 75 year old neighbour opened his front door (these are spring loaded), and so, using his left arm to hold his door open, his trousers promptly fell down, right down to the ankles.
Cue him hopping about shouting 'oooh...oooh...oooh' as he frantically attempted to pull up his trousers using only his right arm. The ladies, to their credit, studiously ignored him.
He is a menace to society and must be stopped.*
*I'll rip the piss out of him every day.
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Post by stxdpr on Oct 10, 2018 8:14:01 GMT
Games; None.
Booze; None.
Bake off; scared and confused by the theme.
Brexit; We're keeping it all quiet so we can get the work done, what have they been doing for the last few years. Its not as if its a sudden surprise.
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Post by Pyjakson on Oct 10, 2018 8:17:08 GMT
I'll just post this quick story. It's more a visual anecdote, so will not translate so well, but here goes:- 2 days ago, I was outside the flat having a ciggy, when I noticed 2 well dressed ladies looking lost. They came over to me and were looking for 'The Jehovans' upstairs. I pointed out that I didn't think they were in, nonetheless, they turned around and started walking back to the stairwell. At this point, dear reader, my 75 year old neighbour opened his front door (these are spring loaded), and so, using his left arm to hold his door open, his trousers promptly fell down, right down to the ankles. Cue him hopping about shouting 'oooh...oooh...oooh' as he frantically attempted to pull up his trousers using only his right arm. The ladies, to their credit, studiously ignored him. He is a menace to society and must be stopped.* *I'll rip the piss out of him every day. You're neighbours with Biscuity Boyle? |
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Post by Faceless on Oct 10, 2018 8:17:56 GMT
Good morning fellow, if I may, chumps. What's the sketch with the wee plastic flippy up bits on McDonald's coffee cups. Pop them up and have them annoy you or rip them off and take half the lid with it. Don't they just slot in to the little groove bit? Can't say they've ever caused me too much stress. Also, what's the deal with airplane food? |
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Post by Faceless on Oct 10, 2018 8:31:50 GMT
Government appoint first ever minister for suicide. No they havnt, they already have a brexit minister. I just tried this out on a work colleague. You know that facial expression, mouth somewhere between a smile and a grimace, eyes cold like they want you dead? That. |
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Post by Sheep2 on Oct 10, 2018 8:55:38 GMT
My trousers were at half mast already,
I don't roll 'em down for just any Jehovah's Witness.
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Post by MrTiddles on Oct 10, 2018 9:12:03 GMT
My trousers were at half mast already, I don't roll 'em down for just any Jehovah's Witness. I'm in two minds as to whether they thought that he does it on purpose to any young ladies passing by. Like a jack-in-the-box, or a cuckoo clock. |
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Post by Shenguin on Oct 10, 2018 9:13:02 GMT
Cuckoo cock?
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Post by Shenguin on Oct 10, 2018 9:14:25 GMT
Good morning fellow, if I may, chumps. What's the sketch with the wee plastic flippy up bits on McDonald's coffee cups. Pop them up and have them annoy you or rip them off and take half the lid with it. Don't they just slot in to the little groove bit? Can't say they've ever caused me too much stress. Also, what's the deal with airplane food? Is it a massive surprise that Crank finds McDonald's intellectually challenging? |
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Post by Sheep2 on Oct 10, 2018 9:18:38 GMT
Don't they just slot in to the little groove bit? Can't say they've ever caused me too much stress. Also, what's the deal with airplane food? Is it a massive surprise that Crank finds McDonald's intellectually challenging? I'd have put good money on it being Bloggie or Baby. So yes it is quite a surprise. |
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Post by Sheep2 on Oct 10, 2018 9:19:48 GMT
I think I may have overestimated the average ability by some distance.
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