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Socky there advertising his mums side job.

Morning

Its Star Wars day!

At this point I'm more likely to go full Rooster Cogburn "Fill your hands you son of a bitch".

In other news I'm going to watch True Grit when I get home.

Well I won't ask you again then.

I've been on a podcast about Bolt Action on a few occasions because I am a BIG DEAL in the sinister war dollies community. I'm not revealing which one, because then you weirdos will track me down and I will wake up with Wee pushing his thumbs into my eyeballs.

I'm amazed you have a significant mammal that is fine with you playing the computer for 6 hours a day. Are you dating etimmeh's avatar?

75 hours in 2 weeks. So basically you've just taken up pixel-farming as a full time job?

I see there is some Edinburgh curry chat. If you are having a curry in Edinburgh you are 100% doing curry wrong.
"Hai guys, may nayme is Callum and this is Ruaridh and we'ull be yur waiturs tooday. So are yoo guys just ouyt for the craic toonight, eh?"

Mother India's Cafe in Glasgow does curry tapas style, which is a nice touch. Its also got a wanker quotient at least 50% lower than any Edinburgh curry house.

I kid, Edinburgh is certainly a place. A place in Scotland. The least Scottish place in Scotland. A place certainly.

Morning w⚓s

A fine victory on my last race of GT Sport session last night.

I qualified 3rd, but the top ten were only separated by less than second, so it looked like it was going to be a close run thing.

It was a clean start from the top 3, but I think something must have happened in the first corner for 4th place and downwards, because we quickly built up a 5 second gap to 4th.

It was very close racing for the three of us, all within around 0.5 seconds to each other, shaving a tenth here, clawing it back there. I managed to sneak into 2nd briefly when my opponent went a little wide, but he managed to get me back a few corners later by squeezing me enough to the side that I had to relent or go off the track. Hard but fair racing.

This kept going for around 4 laps, until the leader made a mistake and went off briefly, allowing second place to take the lead. He had enough momentum to keep me in third, until the next lap when again he went a little wide and I took the opportunity to brake late and turn in early and undercut him

Our little spat had allowed the new leader to build up a 3 second lead on lap 5/8, but I was clearly the faster car, and over the next 2 laps I caught up to him and was never more than around 0.7 of a second behind him.
Even though I was faster, I never seemed able to get close enough to get him on one of the corners, which was frustrating and also confusing.

As we came down the finishing straight on the final lap I was resigned to second place, but then he slowed massivly, and although I came across the line second, it was only by 0.05 of a second.

Well dear reader, it turns out he must have been cutting the corners in a big way to stay ahead of me, because he had 9 seconds worth of penalties which he had not had the chance to pay off since I had been behind him so closely. This promoted me to first place, and a sweet fifth victory.

I’m not saying I’m Prost, but I might be Mansell. As the boring diatribe above proves.

Your face is a load of make up and prosthetics. At least I hope so.

Having been an acting type in my distant past, I've actually been in a number of pantos, mainly as the villain*. The only people who get to have fun in Pantos are the villain and the dame, so its best to choose one of them. The hero is always a cross dressing woman, usually the one in the troupe with the best legs. This isn't sexism because now it counts as tradition so thats fine.

* This shocks no one.

Cough £34.99

Yo!

My recent playing of GT Sport came in handy this morning when I turned into a junction and there was a heck of a patch of black ice. Using all my skills, I took my foot off the brake, popped it down a gear and glided into the corner like a pro.
It helped that I was doing about 5 MPH rather than 150, but whatever.
I got a nod from the van that was driving towards the junction, making me feel like a REAL MAN.

Back in the video game world of GT Sport, in a Gr4 race I qualified 4th and was fighting for 3rd or even 2nd at Suzuka, when I made a massive error and slipped down to 6th. Fought back to 5th. Made a massive error, slipped down to 7th. Fought back to...well, you get the picture. I finished 9th and made a proper twat of myself.
My face is a massive error.
Switching races to the Alsace village, I qualified 10th and finished 7th just by calmly going round the track and not falling off it like everyone in front of me. To be fair to them, it was a shitbox of a car they'd given us, no fun to drive at all, just all over the place.

An appropriate number of stars.

Star Wars day is Saturday for me, so shut up.

If there is childish cruelty to be dished out, you can be certain I'm at the front of the queue.
Its not that I hate my fellow man, its just that thats exactly what I do.